Monday, April 16, 2012

Lookism?

Why is it always ‘Beautiful Princess’, ‘handsome Prince’, ‘Ugly witch?’ Why is goodlooks related to pleasant things and bad looks related to evil and unpleasant things? Isnt beauty supposed to be more than just skin deep? Isn’t it charectar and personality that determines the worth of a person? Or is it the size zero figure, deep blue eyes, long eyelashes and a perfect 5’8 inches frame?

It is said that good looking people are more confident than people who do not look that great. We fought against racial discrimination for some many years. The modern twenty first century discrimination that has been spreading across the globe is ‘’appearance discrimination’’. To say that this is a twenty first century phenomenon may also not be absolutely right, because looks have played an importance role since a very long time. We read in the old Jane Austen and Margaret Mitchells books, how women were expected to be beautiful and slender.
What about people with average looks? What about people who are fat or ugly? Do they not deserve a good suitor?

‘Lookism’ seems to be more prominent in todays world. Even though most of us may not be familiar with the term, we are all very much a part of it. Lookism is a term used to give preferential treatment to goodlooking people. A study shows that goodlooking people are related to positive things and looks to a great extend influences the way a person judges another person. For example why do we say ‘’A murder of crows’’ and ‘’Exaltation of doves?’’. Accept it or not, we all do judge things the way they look.

'A Witty woman is a treausre;A witty beauty is a power''-George Meredith

I am not saying that beauty is bad. It obviously adds to persons personality, but it is not the only thing. Whatever happened to intelligence, sense of humor and wit? Since the time we were small we played with beautiful Barbie dolls and wanted to be like them. I remember fighting with my sister for the ‘’prettiest doll’’. And we dreamt of growing up and being pretty. In school plays and dances, the prettiest girl got to perform in the centre of the stage. We have seen and accepted this discrimination. Studies have also shown that Attractive people have a better social life and many friends. Little children with craniofacial anomalies like cleft palate face confidence issues.

Movies like ‘Shrek’, seems to give out much more than just entertainment. It shows how each one of us have a fairytale life, How appearance can be deceptive and how in the long run, it is the kind of people we are that matter.

We need to learn that that Beauty lies within. We cannot choose how we look, but we can definitely choose the kind of person we can become. Afterall like the famous saying goes, ‘Beauty gets attention, but personality gets the heart’.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

2011 resolutions!! :D

My new year resolutions

So basically your supposed to make a list of things you want to do but you know your never gonna end up doing, right?
Well this time I AM going to do EVERYTHING on my list :D

• Talk less
• Read more
• Grow 2 inches
• I will stop considering French to be a alien language and actually study for my tests.
• Lose weight
• Get either didi or JD married
• I will spend only 2 hours a week on facebook
• I will stop fighting with twilight fans on whats better TVD or the twilight saga
• Im not going to crib
• Il be nicer to riya
• And all animals and people. n things.
• I will have one password and wont change it every week
• Clean my table
• I will finish writing the story. The never ending one.
• I will stop doing voodoo
• Send whatever I have to send to suprita didi and show her tht naayi baala is NOT donka.
• I willnot fight with my sisters or niha or sadaf
• I will study daily.
• I will play some sport atleast during games hour (does stone, paper , scissor count?)
• Im going to finish reading emma (I don’t know since when its on my desk)
• I will not get dreams of sadaf and..uh…never mind :p
• Make Omran dance for the wedding
• Im going to be happy
• Find out why melody itni chocolaty kyon hain
• Im not going to sit in the LR with abhi and rutu and eat chocolates during library hour
• Il get a new phone
• achieve sanity
• Continue postcrossing
• I will not lose my house key. Or moms favorite shoes. Or her wallet. Or anything.
• I will learn all my friends mobile numbers by heart
• Im going to start saving
• Achieve self actualization

• Make sure i do everything in this last atleast by 2020 :D

Friday, April 30, 2010

top 15 reasons why my dad is a superdad!

TOP 15 REASONS WHY MY DAD IS A SUPERHERO

1)There is a picture of me as a 4 year old, painting on a large canvas. It was a beautiful oil-painting my dad had finished and he had kept it in the hall to dry. The little artist that I thought I was, I couldn’t make any sense of the mountains and valleys and started painting over it. What does my dad do when he sees this? He runs to his room and gets his camera, to capture his daughters first ever painting. Never mind me, ruining his work of art, which he probably spent weeks painting!

2) During our exams, papa would make some exotic coffee (which we would hate, but would drink only to make him happy) . And he would stay awake, even though he would have to go to work early next morning. And I’d see the light in his room and know that he’s awake, and that im not alone. Once I’m done studying i go to wish him goodnight, id see that his computer was on, there was a open book in his hand, a glass of coffee in his table and my dad dozing off in his chair with his glasses still on. He’s never looked more cuter

3) He listens to my claptrap : He listens to me drone about school, friends, neighbors, what I saw on the road, the cultural day practice in college, my dreams, what I hate about that shop, my questions (why is it that way, who is he? Is it true we’re all dying?)

4) He makes me feel special. And he’s probably the most encouraging person in this world. When we were small, didi, Riya and me used to make him loads of cards and drawings. Mine, I could say were modern art (none of us still figured out, what I actually tried drawing), but papa would say its amazing, bring out some meaning in it, which I would be delighted to hear. ‘Wow I am an artist!, ’ I believed that all along, until i grew a little older

5) He taught me how to pray

6) I know for a fact that he works really hard, just so that we have a great life, but I never once heard him complain. I know how pa grew! From an maruti 800 to an Audi. From a tiny 2 chaired clinic to a luxurious bigger one. I dint realize how all this gradual change happened, probably because he kept as happy as we are now, even then. He’d probably have made small sacrifices for himself and I know he still does. But he’d never ever say it.

7) He has a golden heart (ohh with maybe even little diamonds and rubies in it) Again, I haven’t seen him refuse to help anyone!

8) He teaches me to become a strong, big girl who can face the world herself. And sometimes I do feel bad when he shouts at me, but so far it’s all been worth it and for one thing id blindly do anything he asks me to !

9) He’s my best friend :D

10) I love it when he cuddles next to us every morning, trying to wake us up early. He’d sing songs and tickle us and try to make us admit that he liked him more than we liked mom (We never succumbed to that though)

11) To the world he’s a 50 year old artist and a doctor, to me he is like an mischievous older brother (im sure this one’s your favorite point, dad :D)

12) He still has our drawings and cards which we made when we were younger ( 3 daughter, a long childhood, . Now that’s a LOT of junk)

13) He has a great sense of humor! Sometimes when ive lost something or im really depressed I find my self guffawing like a psyched-up freak.

14) He taught us what true happiness is. Money and materialistic things hold null value, in comparison to things like a great individuality, sacrifice and love.

15) He’s just simply a great man! My superhero, My rockstar! (this could probably be the reason why moms finds it hard to find a suitable guy for didi \, knowing papa has simply increased our level of expectation from men )

Papa, you might think that sometimes we don’t listen to you. we do! We grasp every word, we respect everything you say. We try to impress you, to make your proud, maybe we’re doing it wrong. But one day we’ll make you proud. Not for ourselves, but for you and for mom!
Sometimes I really wonder if the three of us are worth such an amazing dad. I know I can never ever repay him, but I want to make him proud and I want him to tell people of his three daughter who did great things. I want him to see that, he is the best father in the whole wide world!


I guess this is how every dad is. similiar, but unique in their own way <3

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Fairy-tales are for Real!

Fairytales never come true. There are no beautiful ball’s, no chivalrous knight in his shiny armor, no little loving dwarfs, its all gibberish. Theres an evil world outside waiting to eat you up’
this is what everyone tells me.Aww thankyou very much, that gave me a lot of confidence to move on.

If you told this to a six year old she probably would cry her eyes out. When we were small we were told about the beautiful stories of Cinderella and the beauty and the beast, Peter Pan and Snow-white. We grew up beliving that there is a happy ending for us, that good always defeats evil. And then suddenly, you tell us that its all claptrap? That There is no prince charming, no magical story, no happy ending? that it isnt for real?

They don’t belive in Snow-white or cinderella but they do belive in the evil step sisters , the jealous step-mother, the big bad wolf (refering to the world here) . I wonder why, they think theres no magical story: Because you belive that there is no magical story, you refuse to believe that you deserve the happy ending, you refuse to believe that theres a perfect life…..and that’s what you get!

I like fairytales because i know that if there is a Cruel Ursula, or the wicked stepmother or the witch there also is the kind woodcutter who lets snowhite live, there are the seven dwarves who help an innocent girl out, there is a gentleman in every beast, and that this world has many more heroes than villians.

‘’Zo Fairytales are gibberish. Its so unpractical’’ Is it?
Cinderella,Jasmine, snow-white, belle they went through a lot (only instead of curses and monsters we face the difficulties in modern world like our career, peer pressure, society etc ) and only did they have their happy ending. And that’s what we have been taught right? Work hard and you shall get the fruit of success.

I read somewhere:
Fairy Tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.....

Okay so everyone does not have a perfect ending. But that does not mean that Nobody has a perfect ending! I belive that I will have a perfect ending. Because I belive in Magic and because I Belive that God has made a beautiful world with beautiful things and beautiful feelings. We are just way too negative to see it.

So stop telling me to snap out of my dreamland. Cause without dreaming I wont have it come true. I believe, i know, that we all will live happily ever after, if we want to. And I know fairtytales are for real.

Anyone seen my glass slipper?

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

The shadow behind me

Hi guys! This is the story i wrote when i was in the 9th grade which got selected for the Classmate Young author contest-national finals. One among the 16 that got selected out of a million. Its really old now, but still special to me. Not one of my best works (But then which one is? lol ) Hope you like it.


It was late. Very late….and I was tired. God! This Deepthi of mine! She always ends up in trouble and then rubs it on to me. I suppose she reckons me to be some kind of jinni., who would help her out all the time! All I want now is to crash into my bed. My feet were hurting and every muscle in my body ached. As I entered the life, I was about to press the down arrow but before pressing it, I pondered whether it is minus one or minus two? Minus one. I pressed the button and waited for the lift to reach the basement. Eighteen more floors to glide down, and then, a half-an-hour drive to reach home. I closed my eyes and tried to relax, the elevator stopped at minus one. I got out. No one was there. It was dark.
I looked around for my car; I realized that I had parked it somewhere near the emergency exit. Now where is the emergency exit? It must be really far, as I moved forward, I felt some presence around me, as if someone was following me. I turned around. No one was there. But some kind of fear and anxiety crept into me. It reminded me of the murder of a girl that took place in the basement of the Ivory tower just a week ago. The girl was ruthlessly killed and her body was found under a car the next day! The zooming crime rate is a price we pay while in a developing city.
I noticed that I was completely alone. It was a perfect atmosphere for murderers to lurk around in the night, searching for victims. Right now, I considered myself to be a perfect one! Oh crap! Who’s that? I think I heard distant footsteps; I turned around in an instance. In the distance, I could see a man in a black overcoat. I turned and walked ahead in search for my car. Oh my God! What will happen next? I walked faster and the faster and the footsteps grew more audible. I pretended to be oblivious to it and continued searching for my car, pretending to look confident.
I reached the emergency exit and to my horror, the car wasn’t there! Oh, I must have parked it in minus two.
Oh. My. God.
I was so dead! I headed towards the stairs on my right. As I walked down the stairs, I could still feel the person following me. Oh God, Save me! What if I become to those hard-hearted and debauched people? What will happen to me? What about my family? Will they be able to live without me? I am not even graduated! All my dream and hopes will get terminated, even before i start working on them! Will my body be found under a car tomorrow morning?
As I scanned the parking lot, every second seemed like an hour to me. Why are the parking lots so confusing? I hear some more footsteps. Chill Aaliya! Maybe it is some other harmless guy who is searching for his car. I tried to console myself. Yeah right! Who was I kidding?
As I walked around searching for my car I wondered whether I should call deepthi or the cops. But what’s the point? The sadistic pathetic debauched murderer can overhear me. I bet he will be able to get me even before deepthi gets down! Those footsteps sounded louder….closer….
I walked faster, and so did the footsteps behind me. His pace was equal to mine. I stopped abruptly and looked around. Those dim lights did not help. And then I heard something fall down. Petrified by the noise, I turned around again. Is that his gun or his knife? I couldn’t see anyone around me, but I knew I hadn’t imagined that noise. I turned back and started looking desperately for my car, the next thing I saw was shadow of a tall man.
What could I defend myself with? My nails were long enough to scratch him, but would that do any good? The mirror in my wallet-would it help? Now, how much time would it take for me to open the door, get in, slam the door and get myself out of all this? Just a few seconds….
Just then ‘trring trring’ my mobile phone started ringing. The man could attack me any time now! I pulled out my phone from my purse and spoke ‘hello? Who is this?’
The voice replied ‘Aalia? Where are you?’ it was mom. Hearing her voice, made me feel so much better. But the signal was weak and I couldn’t hear what my mother was saying.
‘Hello? Ma?’ I spoke desperately into the phone. Before I knew it, my only hope drained out along with my mobile phones battery. Oh Great!
I started walking faster…obviously, having no idea where I was to when I heard the footsteps growing louder and faster.
And then finally I saw my red car parked in a corner. I started calculating. It would take me about a minute to reach the place where I had parked my car. If I run, will the man be able to get to me? I’m not really fast, but I guess when it comes to saving my life, I can run! Well, that’s what I hope. Every second seemed like light-years to me. The footsteps grew louder along with my heartbeats. I did not dare turn around. I knew it snow or never! I have to get there. So I walked as fast as my legs could take me. I dug my hands into my pocket for the car key. Where is it?
I felt something like a key. Indeed it was my key….but not my cars. It was the key to my wardrobe! Oh, the keys are in my purse. I took them out and as I was about to unlock my door, I felt someone’s hand give me a tap on my shoulder. I screeched so loudly that it echoed in the deep silence. My worst nightmare was coming true….
‘Aalia what happened?’ Relax its just me….’ spoke the familiar voice. Gathering my courage I turned around to see my friend Brian, looking at me surprised. ‘God! Is it you?’ I asked. A wave of relief passed through me.
‘Not God, Its Brian’ he said giving me a goofy smile.
‘Sorry, I kind of got freaked out’
‘Its okay…I saw you but I wasn’t sure it was you, so I dint call out…and then you went down, and I dint hear you drive out or anything for a couple of minutes….so I came down to see if everything was alright’

I sighed. From a state of utter helplessness to a state of comfort and relief….what a sudden change!
I realized the power of imagination. Most of our fears are just imaginary…there are our own stories. Who are the authors? We are! Fearful thoughts make you fearful, and happy thoughts make you happy. I realized the shadow behind me was just a reflection of my own imagination. Quoting the author John Wayne Dayne, my dad used often say ‘fear does not exist- it is only the fearful thoughts’

Friday, February 26, 2010

the magical world around us :)


Exams, fight with someone, bad traffic, high expenditure, whats going to happen next in my life- this is what we think about all the time. We keep replacing our worries with new ones! There’s something or the else at the back of our mind all the time! The other day I was listening to Paul McKenna droning on about how we should be happy all the time and the same kind of thing different philosophers put in different words. I always believed that all this was theoretical and cannot be put into practice; I mean it isn’t easy to be happy all the time. haven’t they heard... life isn’t fair!
We are always struggling…but then to think about it, why is it that way? Why is that we always give importance to our problems than every other positive thing around us? And if we really try to be happy, somehow happiness finds its way to us (Ohh yeah I do believe in the ‘secret’)
So I tried. For once, I forgot about my exams coming up, forgot about all the projects and assignments piled up in my table, forgot about the little fight I had with my friend and tried to see the happy things around me, and trust me there is so much of positive energy around us!
That smile from the watchman uncle every time I enter college, the impromptu trips to pabbas, the goodnight text message I get from one of my friend every single night, when i found something I lost long time back, a lucky parking place in the mall when I really wanted to go to one of those shops, mom making my favorite dish, last minute ticket cancellation by someone and then being able to watch the movie I’ve been dying to watch, my niece recognizing me after such a long time, a friend request from a person on facebook I hadn’t heard from since a very long time, a nice cool weather, some passerby just smiling at me, the letters from my pen pals, a hug from my friend, papa getting me some little gift, phone calls from my best friend when I’m really down, a polite rickshaw driver or a waiter, the satisfaction I get when I pray to God and knowing that someone is always watching out for me, instead of grumbling every time I trip and fall or do something stupid, suddenly its all funny to me. And suddenly life seemed so much brighter!
We may miss out the BIG things in life .I mean come on, I haven’t got an noble prize, im not a certified prodigy, Im not in the cover of the famous magazines, teenage girls don’t have my posters in their bedroom, Im definitely not the prettiest or the tallest person around but then these small things make my life special: the people living in my world!
If we really see there is more happiness than problems around us and I think we all deserve to be happy :) Because we all are special.

And like Shantodeva says ‘’ If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying? If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying? ‘’

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